Recently I’ve had a lot of “Oh, I’m sorry” comments. I mean, I understand to many the thought of having a child with special needs is more than frightening. I was on that side before where it was such a sad thought to imagine my life as a mother to a non-typical child. But, it’s different now.
Now that Sophie’s syndrome is becoming more obvious I am getting a lot of stares and questions. And, when I explain that she has a missing piece of chromosome that affects development in many areas you can imagine what I hear. “Oh..(pause) I’m sorry” and my reply is always the same, “Don’t be sorry, I’m not” and of course I get the weirdest look from them like I’m crazy.
Yes, having a child with special needs is HARD but it’s not the end of the world. There are many wonderful moments that somehow seem to make up for the hard ones. My child is not a burden she is simply my child. She did not ask to be brought into this world, she deserves the same opportunity to have a normal life as any typical child. This obsession with perfection in society nowadays is sad and twisted because let’s face it, NO ONE is perfect.
She may not be “normal” to society’s standards but to us she is. She was born this way, this is her “normal”, our normal. I’m trying to not let it get to me but it really makes me feel uncomfortable. She is not any less of a human being than anyone else. There is nothing wrong with being different, I really wish people could see that.
So please, don’t say I’m sorry when speak to someone who has a child with special needs. You say sorry for a loss, my child is here with me. And even through all the pain I am not sorry, I am grateful and proud that she is my child.