It’s not always one sided

With the presidential elections approaching there is alot of negative stuff out there circulating the media. I am neither democrat nor republican, I just cannot bring myself to listen to all the bickering and lies of both parties. Why our nation’s leaders cannot just grow up and act like civilized human beings is beyond me. What our country needs is unity if we want to overcome our hardships not teenage drama, we get enough of that in society today . This is not something our leaders should be teaching to our younger generation. Why not lead by example. Instead of being vain, hateful, selfish and greedy we should teach our younger generation to be kind, humble, hard-working and honest. Don’t you think??

My frustration however in this post is about public assistance. I’ve been reading articles and countless facebook posts about it and it really hit’s a sore spot with me. “Not all people on public assistance are lazy moochers who do nothing to help society” blah blah contrary to what everyone thinks. Well, let me share a little bit of the other side with you.  It’s so easy to criticize people especially when you have no clue what walking in their shoes is like. Just can’t judge a book by its cover, remember?!

I had my first child at sixteen years old, I finished school a year later.  My son was 11 months old when I started to work and the rest was history. Before my first child was born my husband and I were already independent living on our own. We barely made it some weeks but we made it. We both worked and our family continued to grow; despite having hardships we found our way to success. I baby-sat two little girls during the day additional to having my own children and working nights for many years. We did good, we worked our way up to vacations and owning our own properties.

And then just three years ago we were knocked into complete despair and chaos with the birth of our special child. We found ourselves in unfamiliar territory, our foundation began to crumble. Her medical bills, copays and medication blew through our entire savings in a matter of months. She was so sick, we were lost. We did not know how we were going to get through. And then the pediatrician told me that if I wanted my daughter to survive I had to quit my job and become her caretaker full-time. At that time my husband had recently been laid off and had to take a position with a fifty percent pay reduction it was a bad time for us. I was terrified, quit my job but how will we survive? And his response was, public assistance. I felt ashamed that he even suggested that. You see, I grew up on the system and vowed to never become one of “those”. You know, those people who sit at home doing nothing while getting help. But nonetheless I quit my job, applied for disability for my child and benefits to help my family. I returned my vehicles because I could not longer afford them and used every single penny of my income tax refund to purchase a used van. I gave up all my little luxuries because I chose my child’s life. I applied for benefits and was turned away, it didn’t matter that I met all requirements or that I did it all by the book because the employees did not do their job correctly. They did not care because society thinks everyone who applies for assistance is a lazy moocher. Thanks to that perception I went weeks without food for my children. I sold all my jewelry, my camera anything that had value to provide for my family and if not for the kindness of a neighbor my kids could have gone to bed without eating. I had to call all the higher-ups, leave messages and ultimately broke down when someone finally listened and helped me. It was one of the most difficult times in my life, I felt like a failure as a mother.

It took me a good year before I realized I had nothing to be ashamed of. I may not be working out of the home but I sure as hell work taking care of my family.  My husband works a minimum of ten hours a day five to six days a week and then comes home tired and helps me with the kids. Lazy, really? I thought public assistance was meant to help families get back on their feet when something happens in life and they are just not making it? While I agree there are so many people out there that get assistance and have turned it into a lifestyle without trying to better their lives not everyone is like that. And that’s the problem! Too many people out there living off of the system. It’s horrible that these people are able to take advantage of the system the way they do. Some have never worked a day in their lives and yet live better than alot of working families. How they manipulate the system is beyond me but they do. And when someone comes along that actually needs a helping hand they are automatically labeled and have to go through hell. Assistance is not a life style it’s a temporary helping hand to get you back on your feet.  I have done everything in my power including moving to a state that will enable us to regain our complete independence. Am I against drug testing to receive assistance? No, I am not. If you really need a helping hand it’s because you’re struggling, right? Should there be stricter requirements to qualify for help? Absolutely. Should assistance be eliminated all together? I do not believe so that would not solve society’s problem. And let’s be honest public assitance is not “the only” financial problem America has.

In today’s society everyone think’s they are entitled to hand outs, that the world owes them something. WAKE UP PEOPLE!! There is a loss of sense of responsibility and a whole lot of laziness and that is the problem. People want to live beyond their means. The classifications of poor, middle class and rich only make it worse. People are terrified of being labeled. Well, I’m not! It does not define who I am, if I am to be labeled I will tell you that I  fall into the  poor category. You read it right, and I am not ashamed. I am not trying to be someone who I am not nor am I trying to live beyond my means. I live a simple life and needing a helping hand does not make you lazy or a moocher. My family and friends know my character and my dedication to succeed in life.

Can the system be more organized? Absolutely….but what about all the other spending this country has. The ridiculous salaries for the “higher up” employees or lavish trips and bonus’. Come on let’s not be hypocrites!

And how about the countless seniors that worked their whole lives and rely on the little bit they get to survive. They paid their taxes and contributed to society. What gives anyone the right to leave them out in the cold. What? because they are no longer young they do not deserve to live a respectful decent life. Remember these are our parents and grandparents not just “seniors”.  And our disabled? Why should they be left to suffer so someone can take a lavish vacation. My husband and I have worked for a long time my daughter should not be denied benefits because someone wants to have some extra spending money. All this is bull shit!

Let’s attack the minority and those who really need us to deter society so they won’t look at the real problem! You can’t fix the system without first fixing the people who create it!


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