Sophie used to suffer from alot of self inflicting and aggressive behaviours, it was scary and exhausting. After changing some of her medications they almost disappeared. It’s been a while since we’ve had a really bad episode. As she is learning to communicate her needs with expressions and gestures they are happening less. Most of the time these acts of aggression are triggered out of frustration, inability to communicate, overstimulation and not able to calm herself with sensory stim.
Over the past weekend I experienced Sophie’s first true toddler tantrum and I immediately realized it was different this time. I was getting her ready to head to the grocery store and got her dressed. As I tried to brush her hair she began to get upset, I sat her in between my legs and held her while I put her hair in pony tails complete with bows. By the time I was done she was furious, she does not like her hair tied up. Now that her hair is growing out I have begun to style it because she needs to get used to it. Having kept her hair very short for so long was necessary to break the habit of pulling her hair out.
After her hair was done I rocked her a bit to calm her then put her down so I could get dressed. She pushed her way through to the bathroom where I was fixing my hair. She loves to play in the toilet and with the toilet paper so it’s not the ideal place for her to be. After taking her out several times her and telling her to go play so I could finish she began to bang her head. I took her out to the hall with her big sister and closed my room door.
She proceeded to bang her head on the carpet and hold her breath until she was blue. That’s when her big sister called for me; neither of us could get her to calm down. She kept crying and crying and when I tried to calm her she gave me the dirtiest look and refused to allow me to calm her. This went on for a good forty minutes until Ariana put her in the computer chair and began to twirl her. She was still not happy with me. But after we got to the store she calmed down and was my little girl again.
I could get upset at the fact that she acted so spoiled but I try to find the positive in every situation. And while she was extremely dramatic I feel very blessed that she had this tantrum. It’s a sign of how she is learning and knows what she wants. Tristan is the tantrum king in our house and she seems to be following in her brothers footsteps. So while many are wishing away their childs tantrums I am welcoming them, at least for now I am.