Prompt # 2.) Dear Man, (an open letter…offer a word of advice, an issue you’d like to address, or a solution to a problem for the opposite sex).
One day you will meet someone who will make your heart skip a beat, you will realize that she is like the air you breath and you do not want to spend a day with out her. You will decide that this woman is the person you want to spend the rest of your life with and when you are ready you will know. And when that happens you will have to cut the cord and put your new family first, yes I said it you have to let mommy go.
If and when one day you do move forward with your plans of spending your life with this person and starting a family always stand up for your wife and children. When you have a wife that unconditionally supports you, who works hard with you and even financially supports your mother and siblings who live in another country, stand up for her. When you have a wife that makes sacrifices that affect her and your children to help your mother who is less fortunate realize how much she loves you for that and stand up for her. Do not, and I mean DO NOT put your mother before your wife and your children. Stand up for your wife.
When your wife allows your mother to move into your family’s home recognize the gift she is giving you and stand up for her. When your wife cries to you because your mother is treating her like crap and being less than nice to your children, stand up for her, DO NOT blow it off as if it’s no big deal. Stand up for your wife, it’s a BIG deal and you did chose to spend the rest of your life with her. When your mother tries to destroy your marriage because she is jealous of your relationship with your wife it’s not ok to ignore the problem, don’t walk away to avoid the situation. Stand up for your wife, stand up for your marriage. And don’t let years pass you by and ignore the whole situation because you do not want to deal with it. Stop it before it starts and stand up for your wife and your family.
Don’t forget special days it may not be a big deal to you but to your wife it is and always will be. Think out of the box when it comes to gift’s, it’s usually the simplest of things that bring the greatest joy. For example…you can plan a picnic in the park, cook her a romantic dinner or quietly take out the camera and take photos of her with her children so she can look and see those memories without her always trying to make them. But don’t forget a woman needs to get all fancied up occasionally. Just. Because.
Oh and the most importantly, saying “I’m sorry” does not make you a lesser man! Don’t give up, never stop trying. Just because you have been with her for 18 years does not mean you can just give up, marriage is a work in progress and will always be. People change and grow in different directions it takes work to keep your paths intertwined.
Sincerely,A Married Woman.